Regardless of the details surrounding a divorce or separation, that first Valentine’s Day without your ex is bound to feel strange and may create feelings of depression any time you find yourself in sight of a giant, shiny heart or romantic advertisement. But are you aware that there are ways to weather this holiday without extra sadness that can improve your entire life and help heal your broken heart? As a culture, we tend to associate love with a romantic partner, yet deeply loving ourselves is key to creating true happiness in any situation. Engaging in activities that honor your own needs and wants and spending time with other loved ones will give Valentine’s Day a whole new meaning.

Focus on Things YOU Love the Most

During this upcoming season of “Love”, focus on whatever brings you the most joy and happiness. Here a few ideas that may spark your creativity:

  1. Treat yourself to a day at the spa or a massage. Who doesn’t love to be pampered? Go get a pedicure, hot stone treatment, salt scrub or whatever healing therapy brings you the greatest sense of relaxation. You are worth it!
  2. Plan a date with your children. Oftentimes, children end up with the short end of the stick after a divorce or separation even though they are the most important people in our lives. Make a special date with your children and take the time to reconnect with those who adore you no matter what is going on in your world.
  3. Spend an evening at home with great movies and food. Cook yourself your favorite meal or have something special delivered to your door, then start playing your favorite (non romantic!) movies. Don’t forget the popcorn and special dessert to enhance the bliss factor.
  4. Develop new habits to improve yourself. Creating a new habit such as an exercise routine may not seem joyful at first, but you don’t have to settle for a boring trip to the gym to get in shape. Start walking or riding your bike outdoors, or join a fitness group to get in shape while making new friends.
  5. Bring joy to other important people in your life. Sometimes the best way to get out of depression is to do something loving for someone else. Make a homemade Valentine’s gift for a friend or send something special to one or both of your parents. Opening up your heart to spread love to others will in turn bring a deeper sense of love into your own life.

Distract Yourself From Overly Romantic Thoughts

As important as it is to treat yourself well this Valentine’s Day, it’s equally important to avoid situations which will inevitably generate thoughts of romance (or rather, the lack thereof). Romantic movies are a common culprit; it’s also best to avoid contacting your ex while steering clear of any restaurant or special place that the two of you used to frequent. And don’t try to find a new partner while your heart is feeling wounded and tender, even if you are feeling lonely. Instead, focus on healing yourself and keep your thought stream as positive as you can by engaging in activities that bring you a sense of peace and empowerment.

A Trusted Professional Can Ease Your Transition: Contact SLC, UT Divorce Attorney David Pedrazas

Going through a divorce or separation is emotionally challenging enough without the added headache and concern of a legal battle. David Pedrazas has been voted one of Salt Lake City’s best divorce attorneys and can make this period of transition as painless as possible. Give our office a call today at 801-263-7078 to schedule a Legal Case Review to discuss your case.

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