Divorce brings up a variety of emotions, such as anger, fear, anxiety, sadness, and uncertainty, and you might be feeling like it’s all you can do to manage your own feelings and get through the experience. However, if you have children, they are counting on you to get them through this confusing time, too. It might feel overwhelming, but while you need to take care of yourself, you also want to provide the support and love your children need. It helps to have counsel like Attorney David Pedrazas, someone who can give you the benefit of their experience and knowledge so you can navigate through and be confident that you did your best to minimize the impact on your children.
The Best Interests of the Children
Spend time with your children and make it a point to focus on them. When you’re together, if they want to talk, listen and encourage them to ask questions and express their thoughts. Remain calm, even if they say something that hurts or seems or unfair. They are working through this just as you are, and if you give them a safe place to express their feelings, they will trust you enough to be honest.
Remember that your ex-spouse is still their parent, and they should never feel they have to make a choice, so be sure to support and encourage the relationship.
In addition to one-on-one time with each child, let them have their normal friendships and recreation. While divorce is going to be on their minds a lot, they should also have time for activities appropriate for their age.
You need to take care of yourself as well, and build time in your schedule to enjoy friendships, exercise, attend a concert, or pursue other interests so you don’t forget there are good things out there for you. This attention to your mental health will benefit your children immensely and teach them valuable lessons about self-care and personal well-being.
Five Things to Never Do
- Don’t put your children in the middle – the reasons for the divorce are between you and your ex, the children should not be leveraged in order to get the upper hand.
- Don’t grill your children for details about your ex and their activities – tempting as it might be to try to get personal information, it makes your children terribly uncomfortable.
- Don’t compete and try to win your children’s affections through manipulation – one of the parties always has more money and better gifts, but what children need from you is love and support.
- Don’t take it personally – because of emotions and tensions running high, your children may say things that hurt you, but don’t let it damage your relationship with them.
- Don’t turn to them for support – find professional support groups or a trusted advisor.
Professional Counsel Is Important
You have plenty to manage and figure out, and you don’t have to do it by yourself. There are changes ahead, you might not know which path to take, and Attorney David Pedrazas and his team can explain the rights, obligations, and choices you have so you can make the decisions with complete understanding.
If you are having trouble resolving the issue of your parental rights, please contact us here, or call 801-263-7078 for a Legal Case Review. Attorney David Pedrazas has been working with people in the areas of family law, divorce, child custody, and child support for more than 20 years and has the knowledge and experience to guide you through.